A wee poem bout Boris

Here’s a wee poem I wrote in response to the delightful one that Boris Johnson wrote about Scotland. Now I don’t have the luxury of having been educated at Eton, but, I would say that my wee rhyme is only slightly less shite than his, if a tad more childish…

Boris Johnson- please allow me to be blunt
Bumbling and racist, you are a wee cunt

Your hair is the color of piss
Watching you strangled, would be such bliss

Of your quips there are many, but among them not even one funny
“cross-eyed texan warmonger’s” aside, your wit flows like shit down a slide, rather than honey

“tank-topped bumboys” and “watermelon smiles”, what a hoot
A serious case, me thinks, of mouth-in-foot

But where does this all stem, I wonder
Was it perhaps, that one time your dad gave his sister the under-the-covers thunder?

Well, whatever the case
The inbreeding has left you a rambling disgrace
And whilst my poem is crude, which may be the case
I swear if I see you, I’ll shout “fuck you” to your face

By dioghaltas

P.S. I’m aware that it’s foot-in-mouth, rather than mouth-in-foot, but this is Boris Johnson were talking about, so it really could be either…that, and I’m also a rebel who doesn’t play by yours, or society’s linguistic rules, man…